I suppose you're off the hook...

Alright, Mr. Beckett, you're off the hook.
Until the next baseball season, anyway.
In response to these developments, I forced that poor polar bear to completely consume the contents of the Coca-Cola bottle you saw earlier. The bear wasn't pleased, but like all good minions, he would do anything for the Divine Purple Elephant Queen, of whom I am a representative.
Now it's the Patriots that need to be worried. I want a perfect season, after all.

That's not a Coke.

I don't care who told you what, that penguin is not giving that polar bear a Coke. Nope, that's the top secret plan of what they'll do if the Red Sox don't win the game tonight. You don't want to know what's inside of it. Top secret, highly confidential stuff. It's so classified, even the Divine Purple Elephant Queen doesn't have access to it. And let me tell you, the Divine Purple Elephant Queen knows EVERYTHING. She knows what you're having for breakfast next Tuesday morning, even if you have no idea. She knows when you'll finally stop putting off your least favorite chore. She knows what your first word was, when you said it, where you said it, and what you meant by it.
So let me tell you, this is top secret stuff. I shouldn't even be telling you it exists. But if I didn't, I'd feel guilty. So be prepared for what will happen if the Sox don't win tonight. Especially you, Mr. Becket. And Big Papi, you should be sweating in your sleep.
Though you better not be sleeping 20 minutes before the game.

Old Dad and Co.

In honor of the Red Sox game tonight, Bob and I invited my father, a die-hard Red Sox fan, over to watch the game. Dad brought along a friend.
So now we've got two old dudes starring at our television, counting down the milliseconds until the first pitch is thrown. It's horribly boring, so I'm stuck blogging for something to do.
On the plus side, Dad's a good cook, for all he is quite a way over the hill. Tonight for dinner he is making Chicken Cordon Bleu, one of his favorite meals to make. I can't wait for dinner, but I can wait for dishes. Where's Bob Jr. when you need him? Dumb kid had to run off to sleep over a friend's house tonight. To bad none of the other 8.5 kids are any good at dish washing.
5:02. That means there are 28 minutes left until the game. Yay!

Ode to the Red Sox

The Red Sox are my favorite team
They play basketball the best.
And they go up and down the field
In adorable yellow vests.

Yes, I do love the Red Sox.
I like watching them make touchdowns.
Whenever I see them play
My smile is no longer a frown.

I could tell you more and more,
about how they hit their puck
but I now must leave
and wish the Red Soxs luck!